Keeping track….. limbo land.

animclay

I continue to be fatigued and really tired.  SOB on exertion, sometimes at rest and to add a new twist I have been dizzy & light-headed enough to feel like I was going to lose consciousness a few times.  Hot /cold flashes.. I’m so tired of this shit.

I know I should go to the ER, but do not want to go. They do all sorts of test, tell me  they can’t get clear test results  because I’m too fat, that my illness is worse, cause I’m too fat and basically come home with the  same multiple diagnosis BS,  a tweak to my meds and the confirmed diagnosis that I’m too fat. Meanwhile I’m dragging my IV pole back and forth to the Bathroom thanks to the IV lasix, can’t sleep in their beds and become even more exhausted.  Last time I didn’t sleep for 2 days and stayed up all night .. you guessed it.. Trying to  bead & trying to breathe!

I’m all packed, just in case I have no choice, but I know I’m walking a tightrope here. I feel guilty that I couldn’t help babysit my darling little niece today, but I could not take that chance.

I wanted to do bead work today, bit cannot muster up the energy to do so. I find it so relaxing, and meditative.

Maybe later. Im in limbo. For me its nap time again…… CatSleeping

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